I’ve been thinking about how many people feel like their marriage is a burden. I agree, marriage is a burden. But I think it’s a burden in a different kind of way. The word “burden” in the Hebrew language means “assignment from God.” Marriage is a burden to our selfishness. It’s an assignment to deal with our selfish nature.

To do marriage well requires a life of surrender and sacrifice, both of which don’t coexist well with selfishness. Marriage is not intended to make us whole. Yes, it fills some of our gaps, but not all of them. Marriage exposes what we do when all of our gaps aren’t filled like we want them to be.

What is it that we humans do when we get exposed? Hide, blame, run, cover up, and any number of other tactics to get back in control. We’re like the wizard of oz, “pay no attention to the frail, weak, aging man behind the curtain, only look at the big image that’s being projected on the screen.”

What burdens do you need to take responsibility for in your marriage?

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