an espresso shot of thoughtful guidance
When men seek help in addressing the issues with their porn use, many times their wives do not seek their own help. While there are a myriad of questions that come up regarding porn use, I often hear wives ask questions like: “Do we need to have more sex?”, “Why am Read More
No relationship is immune to pain. But most of the time we don’t look at relationships as a separate, living entity. We have this idea that relationships are athereal, in existence but not enough so to have their own name, identity. I don’t think this is a helpful way of Read More
Stories can be invitations or implications, how will you receive them?
AlwaysBe Curious Always. I’m here. I’m not going anywhere. I promise. I pledge. For however long we are both here in time, the hope, plan, dream, and goal is with you, always. Be. I’m me. I’m not you. I’m not trying to get you to be me. I’m not trying to be someone Read More
My office sits about 30 yards off of some very busy train tracks. I’ve yet to count out how many different trains pass by each day, but I’d guess it is 15-20. In the Spring and Fall seasons, I enjoy opening the windows in my office to let the fresh Read More
One of the most challenging areas of a marriage is a couples’ sex life. There are a myriad of reasons for this, but in the 15 years I’ve been working with couples, I think it boils down to one core issue: Who is sex for? No one escapes childhood and Read More
There’s a invaluable rule in construction: Measure twice, cut once. If you’ve ever made the mistake of not following this advice, you understand how important it is. One mis cut piece of material can vastly alter the overall structure and finished product. It takes a little extra time, focus, and Read More
Before I release a pre-marital couple to the wild world of marriage, I challenge them to adopt two words (concepts) as cornerstones for their marriage: Grace and Gratitude. Here’s why. Showing grace implies forgiveness, acceptance, and a belief that your spouse is a better man/woman than what the offending action Read More
If you want to be in relationships, you have to learn how to do conflict. One of my mentors, Dan Allender, says it well: “All good communication leads to conflict.” Most of us believe that good communication will lead to consensus, not conflict. The word “communicate” comes from the Latin Read More
Yesterday I wrote about why couples need to keep dating after they marry. Sometimes it’s been so long since a couple has had a meaningful conversation, they’ve forgotten how to do so. When I say “forgotten” I don’t mean that they (or you, if this describes your relationship) don’t know how Read More
